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I’d like to demonstrate this point with a a recent letter from a reader of my book:
“Hi Michael- I'm fascinated by women's tests. I know a woman is interested in me. She 'mentions' that other guys are interested in her. It's an attempt to see my reaction, and create a little jealousy. I don't believe she's being a bitch. She really wants THE MAN, and she's growing impatient. (That's my take on it anyhow.) What's the best way to reframe this kind of test, and yet leave her still thinking I might be interested in her? Is it a bad idea to try to let her know she has a chance with THE MAN? Andrew, Toronto” |
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Hence, you hear about women wanting a man who is TALLER, who is RICHER, (even if she is already wealthy!) who is from a higher social class, etc, etc, etc. And of course, a man who is more DOMINANT than her. Most of all, (whether a woman admits this or not) a woman wants a man who makes HER FEEL that HE is the dominant one.
This is because a DOMINANT MAN makes HER feel FEMININE. When a woman goes out with a guy who SHE has to tell him what to do, who she gets the feeling he is asking HER for approval, she simply feels NO FEMININITY with him, because there is NO CONTRAST. |
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However, since attraction is BASED on the dynamics of power between a man and woman, it would be LUDICROUS to ignore the effect of these social developments on the situation between men and women today. ESPECIALLY when you consider that MOST MEN are ACTING toward women AS IF THEY WERE STILL LIVING IN 1951.
Let me tell you something: That behavior has only become a formula for disaster in the last couple of generations. |
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up |
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